Tour Guides

I’ve been on countless Chinese guided tours and not once have I gotten a tour guide that I liked. Maybe it’s always because I know I can do a much better job than them. Career change? This time my tour guide literally only spoke Mandarin, he came from China about 12 years ago, and has been a tour guide for about 11. He knows very little and very poor Cantonese and a small amount of Engrish. Usually on these tours they’ll say stuff in Cantonese and in Mandarin to cover their basis, well whenever he spoke Cantonese, it would be a different set of instructions than what he gave in his mother tongue, Mandarin, during the beginning of the trip he looked really flustered, like he was new to this job, only at the end of the trip did he reveal that he had been doing this for 11 years. My mom had to translate this last part for me, but apparently all the mainlanders thought that he did such a good job, they started asking him what other tours he would be involved in, because they wanted to sign up as well. WTF?